Figment, стр. 41

"Well, that's part of it." The Cheshire sniffed for food in the kitchen. "But we're also showing her we're as strong as she is."

"Why would we need that?"

"The world is complicated, Gorgy." The Cheshire picked a fish's spine and sucked on it. "The Wonderland Wars are coming. The Queen and her followers will have the upper hand. And since the likes of me and you aren't really considered the good guys, we need to find our place in it."

"How so?"

"By proving how badass we are." He licked his paws. "I love that word, 'badass.' People really like it in this world."

"Are you saying part of us doing this is for her to stop underestimating us so she would have us join her league?" Gorgon turned around, anger flushing his face. This wasn't part of his plan. Under no circumstance would he join the Queen's army.

"Of course not," the Cheshire lied, and threw the spine away. He clapped his paws clean and said, "I was joking. We're doing this to expose the Queen, of course."

"I knew I shouldn't have trusted you," Gorgon grunted. "But I have to take my revenge."

"We all have our dark ticks, Gorgy." The Cheshire patted him. "Don't be hard on yourself. You just killed a few kids, that's all. Kids die every day in the world, be it starving, be it underage soldiers, or dying from diseases. No one ever makes a fuss about it."

"I don't feel good about it. I only did it for—"

"I know, I know," the Cheshire said. "To expose the companies working for the Queen and the Duchess. We already said that."

"I still need to know why you are helping me," Gorgon said. "We haven't been really close in Wonderland."

"I'm after the Pillar and Alice. I'm sending them a message they will eventually catch on. A terrifying message. But what does it matter? You're on my team now. Look at you." The Cheshire spun Gorgon around to look back in the mirror. He pointed at his reflection with pride and enthusiasm. "Look at the glory of what you have become. From a nobody cook for the Duchess, hardly remembered by any child who read the books, to a lame scientist in this world, to one of the scariest villains on earth." The Cheshire was proud, and Gorgon felt hypnotized by the words. The Cheshire had a way of making everything sinister and bad sound so good and endearing. For a damaged man like Gorgon, it was just an admired trait. "From nobody to a proud Wonderland Monster," the Cheshire repeated. "Now let's show the world your magnum opus. Let's make some humans suffer!" He rubbed his paws together. "Mass-poisoning London. How beautiful."

Gorgon nodded, angry veins showing in his eyes.

"We need to give it a word, though," the Cheshire said. "Something catchy. You know, how people like marketing and stuff."

"Something catchy?"

"Yeah, the same way they have catchy names for their products: Snicker Snackers and the like. I got it!" He flashed one of his claws. "We'll call it an 'Epidemic of Tarts.'" The Cheshire laughed.

Chapter 5 2

Graduate Common Room, Christ Church, Oxford University

Fourteen minutes past midnight, the Pillar guides me through the empty, dimly lit corridors of Tom VII in Christ Church, Oxford University. He is supposedly going to show me into a room that has the ability to help me travel back to Victorian times. Given all the madness I have seen, I am still skeptical about the concept of going back in time. If it were possible, and relatively easy, why wouldn't all Wonderland Monsters use it?

"Are we there yet?" I whisper.

"Patience, my dear Alice," he says, counting the doors left and right. "It's been a long time since I've been here. They always change things in the university," he uses his pocket watch as some kind of compass. I don't bother to ask. "A few years ago they made a mess out of the university to shoot a Harry Potter movie," his voice shows he really disliked it. "But I'm not feeling like I am Dumbeldore now. Thank you very much."

"Until you find that door, I am still wondering why Professor Gorgon Ramstein, a.k.a. Muffin Man, is doing this," I say, neglecting any silly side jokes of his. "I mean, I know the government dismissed his research, killed his lawyer, and he feels responsible to expose the food corruption of companies. Is that enough reason to massacre all those people?"

"Of course not." The Pillar is still looking for the door leading to the time travel room. "The Muffin Man, like all of us Wonderlanders, took a new identity in this new world. He became a professor. He even got married and had three kids. Margaret Kent ordered his kids killed."

I stop in my place. The Pillar notices and turns to look at me. I can feel silent anger creep up in my veins.

"Shocked?" He raises an eyebrow. "Well, do you want to know how his kids were killed?"

"I think I have an idea." Although I am beginning to get used to shocking deaths, I don't want to say it.

"Margaret seduced his kids to eat a great amount of expired Queen of Hearts Tarts," the Pillar says. "Enough to get them poisoned...slowly. When Gorgon drove his kids to the hospital, the nurses were ordered to conspire with Margaret and look away until the kids died."

"The same way he wants to kill everyone in the country," I lament. "And you still think something more sinister happened to him in Wonderland?"

"I am hoping so," the Pillar says. "Because if the Muffin Man is only fueled by his present-day anger, I don't know of any way we can stop him. To be honest, the man has been squashed like cockroach in this life. And I don't know how to use this time machine to go back a few years. It's a Wonderland time machine. It only goes back to Wonderland. Let's hope we find a trigger point in his past and stop the story from the beginning." The Pillar turns the knob of the door next to him and pushes it open. "Welcome to the time-travel room."

I read the sign on the door as I enter. "The Graduate Common Room?"

"Formally known as Professor Einstein's Room." The Pillar follows me in and closes the door behind us.

The room is modernly decorated with a notable fireplace and a huge desk with old English carvings. There are a few souvenirs here and there, looking as if transported from the Museum of the History of Science. A couple of couches colored red and black are set on one side. There is a table with magazines in front of a large window looking out into the garden. One thing stands out: a blackboard with mathematical writings on it.

"Albert Einstein?" I ask.

"He lectured in Oxford for a while, and was given this room in 1930." The Pillar takes off his suit's jacket, which he rarely does. "I suppose you know Einstein is in many ways the father of the concept of time."

"I'm insane, but I went to school," I say, eyes on the blackboard. "So Einstein really knew how to time-travel?"

"Of course he did. Einstein was as mad as Lewis. While Lewis Carroll stuttered, Einstein was actually autistic, but few people know that. Einstein was a great fella—bad haircut, though." The Pillar pulls the blackboard to the middle of the room. He does it with care and respect. "This same room had been Lewis Carroll's room for five years when he studied here."

"Wow." I like the connection. Didn't know about it. "That's about seventy years before Einstein came."