Blood Kiss, стр. 63

Frowning, she looked around the empty room for no good reason. The problem was, she never put the damn thing in there—she was always in too much of a hurry to bother with the unzipping. Plus she had this paranoia that she’d forget to secure the pocket back up and she’d lose her cell.

Never once had she put the phone in there.

Had someone been through her stuff?

One by one, she sorted through the items on the table. Nothing was missing that she could see, although it wasn’t like she kept a detailed mental list of her necessaries. And when she checked her wallet, her ID, credit cards and cash were all still in there.

Well, if anything had been taken, it wasn’t worth more than two cents.

As she put her things back in, she swallowed a load of creeped-out, but what was she going to do? Go to the Brothers with an, “Oh, my phone moved to this other pocket here and…”

Yeah. Right.

With no bars showing on her reception, she went over to the landline that was mounted on the wall by the glass-fronted refrigerator filled with Gatorade, Coke, and juices of various sorts. When she picked the receiver off the cradle, the dial tone was just like it was at the audience house, so she hit 9 for an outside line and punched in her father’s number.

Fedricah answered, and in a cheerful voice, she told the butler that she was going to spend the day at the training center because she was working on something for extra credit. She also assured him that she was going to be chaperoned.

And it was true. She wasn’t going to be alone—not if she had any say in things.

Craeg was going to take care of her.

“Does it hurt?”

As she hung up, she looked over to the door. Craeg was standing in the jambs, his bare chest gleaming, his pecs and abs standing out in stark relief under the ceiling lights.

Dropping her lids, she ate up the sight of his body—and thought, actually, she did have an ache all of a sudden.

“Hello?” he demanded.

“I’m crashing here for the day.”

As he went stock-still and narrowed his eyes, she held up her cell phone to him. “No bars. No service. Guess we’re going to have to figure out another way to hook up at seven, won’t we.”

Chapter Thirty-five

Out in the training center’s parking garage, Butch escorted the four trainees who were leaving to the door of the bus, making sure they all got on with their shit. Then he went back inside and walked the long corridor toward the office with a slow stride. He had no idea where Marissa was, but he was hoping, when he resurfaced up at the mansion, that she had called him back, texted him, something.

He’d left his phone on the dining room table up in the mansion by mistake. But maybe that was a good thing. He’d been driving himself crazy checking the device at First Meal.

Meandering down the empty hall toward the office, he became acutely aware that he was essentially alone in the facility: V and Tohr had already headed back to the house with Doc Jane, Manny, and Ehlena to get ready for Last Meal, and likewise, all doggen were working up in Fritz’s big kitchen. And Paradise, Craeg and Axe were eating in the break room.

Dear Lord, what if Marissa had moved out of the Pit? he thought.

Oh, fuck, what was he going to do if—

As he opened the glass door, he froze.

“Hi,” his shellan said from behind the desk.

She was so beautiful, sitting there with her office clothes on and her blond hair down. Man, he loved those waves falling over her shoulders like something out of Game of Thrones, and that silk blouse with its slight hint of pink brought out her skin like she was in a magazine ad for Estee Lauder.

“I got your calls. Your texts,” she said as she stared across at him.

Entering the office proper, he let the door close by itself and wasn’t sure whether he should sit down in a chair. Pace. Fall to his knees and start apologizing.

“I’m sorry—”

“I’m sorry—”

They both shut up. And the silence that came next was a period of each of them waiting for the other to speak.

“Look, I should have told you about Xhex,” he said, biting the bullet. “I didn’t because I just … it was before you and I were together seriously. I met her one night at Rehv’s club—it was just that night, and it wasn’t anything on either side. I had no idea she was going to end up living with us, and by the time she was, it was just one more thing I was leaving behind, you know?”

“I know. I get it.”

He waited for her to say more, but when all she did was look down at her hands, he frowned and sat in the chair opposite from her. “You sure about that.”

“Yes.”

Butch shook his head at the continued quiet. “I know I’m not perfect here, but if you honestly think I want her now over you, I’m going to get pretty fucking pissed off.”

“No, I know you don’t.”

And still she said nothing further. In the vacuum, while he tried to convince himself not to jump out of his own skin, he thought of him and Xhex high-fiving each other and joking about how he owed her because she’d saved him in a fight in an alley with some slayers. “She’s one of the guys, for fuck’s sake.”

“I know.”

Bringing up a hand, he rubbed his twitching left eye. “Do you.”

Jesus, what was wrong with them? Talking had always been so easy, like breathing. Now … all this silence.

“Just say it,” he muttered. “Whatever it is, however much it will hurt me, say it—just don’t leave me sitting here wondering what the fuck you’re thinking. My head’s going to explode.”

“Why didn’t you tell me about the hair?” she said in a rush.

Butch snapped his head up. “Excuse me?”

“I saw the interview. With that trainee.” She pointed to the computer screen. “I watched part of it. The part where you were telling a perfect stranger something that you’d never shared with me.”

“The interview—? Oh. That.”

“Yes, that.”

Butch resumed scrubbing his eye. “That wasn’t anything important.”

“Yeah, I guess I’m stuck wondering how many other things you’ve decided that about? I mean, what else don’t I know about you? After this long together, I thought I knew everything … I thought…” She got choked up a little, but was able to cast that aside. “What else don’t I know, Butch.”

As he looked across the desk into her eyes, a feeling of unease rippled down his spine. She was staring at him as if she didn’t know him at all.

“Marissa—”

“Seeing that beaten girl on the couch in the living room of Safe Place completely ruined me. The whole … violent ugliness of it, the suffering, the up-close pain, the way she looked at me, pleaded at me with her eyes.” Marissa’s slender shoulders trembled. “I didn’t tell you all that because I was afraid to trigger you about your sister. I didn’t talk to you because I didn’t want to upset you. There. I said it. It doesn’t make me happy, and it really doesn’t make me feel any better … but that’s what I’ve been hiding from you. Oh, that, and seeing my brother again broke my heart in half, just crumbled me. It made me miss parts of my old life, and that made me feel like I was betraying you.” She put her hands up. “That’s what I got. So what have you been hiding.”

When he went to open his mouth, she stopped him. “Before you speak, be very aware that I love you. I love you with everything I have and all that I am. But if you do not get real with me, I’m going to go back to the Pit, pack a bag, and move to Safe Place for a while.” She held his stare with unwavering eyes. “You and I are not going to survive long term, regardless of love or bonding, if you keep airbrushing things. If I keep airbrushing things. It’s not a good strategy for us—and if this makes you feel like you’re on the spot? As if I’m giving you an ultimatum? I don’t care. If anything gets in the way of our relationship, anything, I will mow that shit down—even if it is you.”