Shiver : 13 Sexy Tales of Humor and Horror, стр. 61

“You’re kidding. Have you called the cops?”

“Not yet. I just got here. They hit the office next door to ours as well. The one belonging to Madame Zia. I’m with her now.”

“The hot psychic?”

“Yeah, I guess.” Heat warmed his cheeks, and he snuck a glance at Zia to see if she’d heard the comment. Ignoring him, she’d turned back to the task of cleaning. “She thinks something evil happened here. She claims she can ‘feel’ it. In fact, she’s arguing that it was a spirit or a ghost that trashed our offices.”

“A ghost?”

He heard Jake chuckle, and muffled voices in the background. “Who are you with?”

“I’m over at Sunny’s house. Edna brought by her famous cinnamon rolls, and we’re drinking coffee and having second breakfast.”

Finn pictured Sunny, the woman in Jake’s life, with her round curves and curly blonde hair, and imagined just what Jake’d had for his first breakfast. Edna was Sunny’s eighty-something-year-old neighbor who thought her substantial viewing of television detective shows gave her the ability to solve actual crimes. “Don’t tell Sunny’s kooky neighbor about this. She’s probably got Ghostbusters on speed dial.”

Jake laughed. “Too late. Give us ten minutes. We’re headed over to the office now. All of us.”

“Great.” Finn looked over at Zia as he disconnected and shoved the phone back in his pocket. “I guess one more kook around here won’t hurt anything,” he mumbled. “She’ll probably fit right in.”

Fifteen minutes later, Jake arrived with Sunny and Edna in tow. Finn had called the police to report the break-ins, and was waiting for them to show.

He grasped Jake’s hand. “You didn’t have to come down, man. I could have handled this.”

Jake shrugged. “Are you kidding? I had to check this out. It’s not every day a spirit breaks in to your office.”

Sunny gave Finn a warm hug. Jake was a lucky man. That woman was a real catch. Always smiling, funny, and a great tush.

She offered him a mischievous smile. “We didn’t want to miss out on seeing the ghost. We would have been here sooner, except Edna had to get her Ghosthunters kit.” She gestured to her neighbor.

Edna had already stepped into Finn’s office, holding what looked like a checkout clerk’s scanner in front of her. She wore jeans, floral Wellingtons (Finn hoped that was because she had been gardening and not because she was afraid she might step in ghost droppings), and a black t-shirt with the words “DUDE! RUN!” emblazoned across the front. A canvas messenger bag was slung across her bony shoulders, and wires and cords protruded from either side.

“Seriously, Edna? What in the world is that?” Finn pointed to the gadget in Edna’s hand.

“This is an EMF meter. I got a voice recorder too in case we hear the spirit. They were a combo pack. I got ’em both for fifty dollars on eBay.”

“Well, I’m sure that was money well spent. What’s it supposed to do?”

Edna waved it slowly around the room, as if it was a metal detector and she was looking for lost coins. “It measures the electromagnetic fields in the room. It detects alternate current patterns and alerts us to the presence of spirits.”

Finn shook his head at Jake. “I think I’m gonna need some spirits. Of the liquid variety. Can it detect if there’s a spirit of scotch in the room?”

Edna waved the little meter near the chair hanging from the ceiling, and it went berserk, beeping and flashing lights like she’d just won the jackpot on a ghostly slot machine. Her eyes went wide, and she fumbled in her bag for the voice recorder. “Do you see that?” she called out, her voice taking on a breathy singsong quality. “Hello? Are you here? Can we help you?”

Sunny moved closer to Jake, her eyes as wide as Edna’s. “Is there really a ghost in here?” she whispered.

Finn rolled his eyes. “Of course not. Somebody’s cell phone probably rang and set that crazy doohickey off.”

“If there’s something crazy going on, I knew it would have to involve Edna,” a deep voice spoke from the doorway of the office, and the group turned to see Officer McCarthy of the Pleasant Valley Police Department standing there. “I got a call about a break-in.”

“Oh hi, Mac.” Edna waved sweetly, having met the officer several other times in her attempts at crime solving.

He nodded. “Hello, Edna. How’s your granddaughter?”

Edna laughed out loud. “Very smooth, Mac. Way to slip that right in there.” She turned to Finn. “Mac met my granddaughter, Zoey, this summer when she came here to dodge some reporters. She’s a key witness in a case, and he helped save her life. And he won’t admit it, but he’s also got a thing for her.” She pointed at the policemen. “I know she likes you too, so why don’t you just call her, you big lunkhead?”

The police officer ignored the rib and pulled a notepad from his pocket. He turned to Finn. “Why don’t you tell me what happened here? Did I hear something about a ghost?”

Chapter Three

Zia set the table upright and straightened the velvet cloth that sat atop it. She’d managed to put the majority of the room back together, and had lit a fat white candle for peace and protection. A bowl of sage burned on the table to cleanse the room of negative spiritual energy.

She’d rescheduled her clients for the day and taken off the purple robe. Underneath she wore a stretchy black top with lace trim and a red pencil skirt.

Picking up her EMF reader, she slowly scanned the room for any signs of disturbance or spectral beings.

A knock sounded on her office door and a parade of people entered the room, led by Finney. She was pleased to see the way his eyes popped when he took in her outfit. A warm feeling filled her as she watched him swallow before meeting her eyes.

Men. They were so easy. Most men thought that going out with her would be exciting, the idea of dating a witch giving them an extra thrill. They were usually disappointed when they realized that instead of a being a wily seductress in black garters, she was usually in bed by nine with a good book, wearing flannel pajama pants covered in cat hair.

But Finney didn’t seem to have any interest in her witchcraft abilities at all. In fact, he thought it was all nonsense and even made fun of her. She definitely didn’t need that kind of energy in her life.

So why was she imagining herself in bed reading, but cuddled up next to him? Without the flannel pants. Now that she knew what a fuddy-duddy he was, he’d probably ignore her to read the latest issue of Detectives R Us. Why was she fantasizing about taking off his reading glasses and his shirt, but leaving on the holster and the gun? Maybe he had a tattoo. Whoa. Down, girl.

She was getting carried away. A guy like that might have a tattoo, but it probably said “Mom” or the Japanese symbol for “boring.”

“Zia, this is my business partner, Jake Landon, and his girlfriend, Sunny.” Finn’s introductions drew her out of her musings. He pointed to the elderly woman who was perusing her bookshelves. “And this is Sunny’s neighbor, Edna Allen.”

Edna waved. “We already know each other. I came to Madame Zia for a reading earlier this summer.”

Finn rolled his eyes. “Of course you did.”

Edna waved a dismissive hand at Finn. “Don’t make fun. She was spot-on. She told me that I was going to find something this summer. Something I thought I had lost a long time ago. And something with an element of danger to it.”

Zia smiled warmly at Edna. “It’s nice to see you, Edna. And I’m curious, did you find it?”

Edna laughed. “I sure did. And he’s back at my house now working in the garden.” She wiggled her eyebrows. “And he brought danger with him all right, but now the only thing that’s dangerous is that our passion is so hot it might burn my house down.”

“Eww. Edna, stop it. I do not need that image in my head.” Sunny shook her head good-naturedly at her neighbor. “It’s nice to meet you, Zia. Sorry about the trouble. This is Officer McCarthy; he’s responding to the call about the break-in.” She pointed to the tall, good-looking police officer who had followed them in.