Gold, стр. 45

She was slack-jawed at his admission.

“When I’m with you, I want you, not the illusion you’ve created,” he continued.

“I don’t know what to say.”

He knew everything about her, but she knew next to nothing about him. She hadn’t wanted to know. She had thought that was part of the arrangement. He was married, and she was his sugar baby. That was how this worked. She didn’t love him, and she certainly couldn’t say she did.

“I don’t expect you to say anything. I’m sure it’s all a shock, but I want you, Bryna,” he said, using her name for the first time. “Choose me.”

Haven’t I already done that by flying out here?

She swallowed. There was no other choice.

“I choose you.”

Hugh leaned her back against the desk and made his way back down her body. The intensity with which he consumed her revealed how much her words meant to him. She came, writhing on the table under his capable hands and practiced mouth. Her world slipped away, and she used the ecstasy of this dream to help her forget what she had left behind, to remind her why she had chosen this to begin with.

She heard a zipper, and then his pants hit the floor.

“Fuck, Bryna,” he groaned.

He maneuvered himself to her opening, and she felt the building pressure when he entered her in one swift motion. He wasn’t gentle with her, and she liked it. It felt like punishment. She needed it. She let it wrap all around her. She wanted him to be brutal, to fuck away her nightmares.

He rocked into her again and again, leaving nothing but the sound of their bodies slapping together in their wake. When Hugh flipped her over and forced her flat against his desk, she tried to push the image of Eric out of her mind. She had decided long ago that he didn’t matter. She needed to remember it again.

Hugh gripped her tighter, and she felt her own climax building, despite her dark thoughts. Or maybe it was because of her dark thoughts. She didn’t even know anymore. All she knew was that they hit that spot together. Both soared away to another place and another time, and her release left her in tatters once more.

THE NEXT MORNING, Bryna felt like hell. Even though she had slept for nearly a day straight, it hadn’t helped. She had bags under her eyes from crying, and her stomach was still in her throat.

She applied a healthy dose of makeup to get rid of the side effects of her unnecessary tears. She grabbed her phone and checked it for the first time since she had landed in New Jersey. She had three missed calls and five text messages from Eric. She sighed heavily. Great.

She opened the first one.

I know I fucked up. That wasn’t how I wanted to tell you that I like you. Please let me explain. I don’t want to lose you.

Bryna closed her eyes and fought back the wave of emotions that hit her. She couldn’t do this. She needed some time away to think about what she wanted to do. She had chosen Hugh last night, and right now, that was where she needed to be. She deleted the other messages before reading them and tucked her phone away in her purse. She promised herself she wouldn’t look at it again while she was here.

Holding back her frustrations, she walked out of the bedroom to find a huge platter set up for breakfast.

Hugh smiled brightly when he saw her. “You look refreshed.”

It couldn’t have been further from the truth.

“Thanks. What’s this?”

“I thought we could eat together. I have some time before my first meeting. Care to take a walk down the boardwalk?”

“Sure.”

She sat down and ate a pancake, some eggs, and fruit, and then they left the hotel room. The resort was right on the water, and it was teeming with high school spring breakers. It was hard to believe that had been her a year ago. She had spent her senior spring break alone. She didn’t like to think about that.

“It’s nice to be away,” she admitted.

Hugh stepped out of the way of some kids running down the boardwalk and pulled her with him. “It is.”

“I’d love to do this all the time.” She felt wistful. She couldn’t abandon school or the cheer team, but this was paradise.

“Well, what about this summer? Do you have plans?”

“No.” She hadn’t really thought about it.

“I’m opening a new resort in Barcelona.”

“Really? That’s amazing. Barcelona is beautiful!”

“In that case, will you come with me?”

“To Barcelona?” she gasped out.

“For the summer.”

“The whole summer?”

“As long as you’ll have me.”

She couldn’t believe it. Her brain couldn’t wrap around it. Even after everything he had done for her, she still thought it was crazy that he would want to bring her.

“I want to take you with me—not as Bri, but as Bryna. No more secrets between us. Just you and me.”

Her heart leaped in her chest. This is what I want. Right?

He didn’t see her as a sugar baby. He saw her more as…his girlfriend. But what else am I? When did everything spiral so far out of my control?

When she didn’t answer right away, Hugh looked concerned. “You don’t have to come with me. It would be a bunch of fancy dinners, a ribbon-cutting ceremony, lots of shopping. You’d probably hate it.”

Bryna laughed. “Okay. Twist my arm, why don’t you?”

“I want you there with me to experience it all.”

“All right. I’d love to go.”

Bryna returned to campus the next day. She’d had so many missed notifications that she had turned her phone off in annoyance. She didn’t know what to say to anyone, and she wasn’t ready to be herself anymore. It had been nice to be with Hugh, away from reality for a bit longer.

She dove headfirst into classes the next day. On her way out of the film building, she found Eric waiting for her.

“Bri, can we talk?”

“No.”

She walked toward her car, but Eric followed.

“You were gone. I went to your place. I asked around. No one saw you.”

“Eric, stop.”

She ground to a halt and stared into his hazel eyes. They were so full of concern that she almost looked away. But she couldn’t. She needed her hard exterior for this.

“I have to process what happened this weekend. It’s not going to be like a light bulb where I flip a switch, and everything is better. The more you push, the farther you push me away.”

He pursed his lips, but she could tell he knew she was right.

“Well, things with Audrey are over. You have to know, I never meant to hurt you. I didn’t think anyone really could.”

“I’m not hurting,” she lied.

Eric gave her a don’t-give-me-that-shit look. He could see through her. “Okay, Bri. But think about one thing before I go. Remember when you said, at the national championship game, that you were only comfortable with me because you knew nothing could ever happen between us?”

“Yes?”

“It proves that, even then, you were thinking about something happening. You were too scared to admit it to yourself.” He threw his hands out in supplication. “I’ll give you all the space you need, but you’ve changed me as much as I’ve changed you. I want to give this a shot, and I’m not going to give up.”

Bryna swallowed hard. “We’ll see how long this lasts before you go back to her.”

“Knowing you’re within reach? Never.”

He was so sincere. It almost softened her to him, but then the image of Audrey hit her all over again, and she couldn’t do it.

“We’ll see. Good-bye, Eric.”